Friday, May 29, 2009

Friday Confessions

It’s that time again! Hopefully these won’t be as lame as last weeks.

1. Today I’m headed to Orlando to have a mommy retreat with some ladies from my mom’s group and our special guest speaker, Kearsie.

2. The above may just sound like a plain ol’ statement unless you know me. If you do, you know I totally freak about traveling and get all nervous. I’ll be taking an extra prozac just for the trip.

3. Don’t mock the insane.

4. Last Friday, we (the fam, minus the two little girls) went to what I lovingly call the “Space Place” which is really just the Kennedy Space Center. That’s where the second disaster happened.

5. The first disaster was the day before. Thursday. When I was cleaning like a mad woman. I apparently squirted toilet cleaner on my FAVORITE pink Auburn shirt. Turns out that stuff is powerful and will ruin a good shirt.

6. Back to my second disaster. We are standing in the play area (Space Place) while T runs around having a good time. Anthony says to me, “You have grey hair.” Ummmm.excuse me??? No. No I don’t. So we bring Chad over to confirm. Still NOT a believer. Hubs takes a pic and shows me. I almost vomited. I AM 25 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!! There was a whole big ol’ blob of grey in my hair!!!!! Rachel said she didn’t tell me because she thought I knew. Please. I would have ripped my hair out.

7. Turns out I did have *some* grey strands of hair. I also had a section of my hair that wasn’t fully grey. Turns out I got toilet cleaner in my hair. Toilet cleaner bleaches hairjust in case you didn’t know that.

8. At least my disaster had a positive outlook. I told Hubs that the grey was the last straw. I was getting my hair fixed. Highlighted. Colored. Whatever it took. He agreed.

9. I KNEW God wanted me to have highlighted hair.

10. Rachel saved the day and did it (the highlighting) for mefor free! I just had to buy the stuff. Now I’m a hot momma once again. Okmaybe just my head. Oh well. That’ll do donkeythat’ll do.

11. By the way, the Space Place is not worth the price you pay for it. I meanit’s cool and all but seriously? $40 a person? Let’s be real. I could have gone to Disney for that price and then paraded around all day like a princess. A princess with grey hair.

12. Lately I’ve really been wondering something about motherhood. I know that when man sinned, God said he would greatly increase our pain in childbirth. I can read. I understand that. What I don’t get is why we have to suffer through pregnancy, childbirth, sleepless nights, and then still, even a year and a half later, still be reminded we birthed a child each time we look in the mirror. I didn’t forget I had her!!! I see her everyday. Why do I have to carry around physical reminders such as the “hula hoop” around the waist, stretch marks in place you don’t want to know about, hips that don’t quite look the same, etc.? WHY?????

13. Also, why doesn’t my husband have these reminders? Oh wait. He didn’t carry her, puke because of her, spend 48 hours in labor, and then deliver her. Men get the fun part. Durn it.

14. I made the decision this week to become one of those crazy exercise freaks that runs 7 times a day and watches tv doing sit-ups. I figure if I spend every day like that, I won’t continue to be reminded of pregnancy and child birth.

15. That decision lasted all of about one day. I ran. Around my house. To the tune of The Backyardigans.

16. I’m pretty sure had someone else been in our house, Ansleigh would have been ashamed and embarrassed by her momma for the first time in her life.

Have an awesome weekend ya’ll! Leave me lots of comments while I’m gone. Wait. Let’s be real. Hardly ever does someone comment. You must all secretly hate me. BOOO. Still, have a good weekend.

I lurve you all for putting up with me.

3 comments:

Lacey said...

Hey, medicated mommys are still just as good! I should know! :-) I found my first *real* grey hair when I was 21, so don't fret! It just means you have lots of smarts up there! Love ya friend!

Adrienne said...

Love the post...you are hilarious!!!Did you happen to check out the MTV Movie Awards where they showed the trailer for New Moon???

Insanity Kim said...

TWENTY FIVE? Psh. I have tons of gray hair and I am...um...35...

Grey...are you from Canada? I have gray hair...and a lot of it, eh?

I hate traveling too; I get to go across the continental US with two kids in 4 days...oh, pray for me!